Anyone who has ever worked in an office will be familiar with nonsensical “corpspeak” – that meaningless business jargon that so favoured by those in meetings and widely used when people are trying to impress colleagues.
Richard Andrews, MD of Inspiration Office, an Africa-wide office space and furniture consultancy, said for his Christmas Wish List there are certain phrases he hopes to never hear again in an office in 2017.
“It’s an odd phenomenon that when otherwise plain speaking people pass through the portals of the office, their language changes. It’s almost like they’re visiting another country where people speak a different language.”
Andrews has compiled his Top Ten Offices phrases he never wants to hear again:
1) Touch base offline – this means let’s meet later sometime. In yet another meeting
2) Blue sky thinking – aka limitless thinking or thinking as if all were possible
3) Stick a pin in it – to deal with something later
4) Throw it against a wall and see if it sticks – try something to see if it actually works because we have no idea if it will
5) Deep dive – really getting to the bottom of something
6) Ecosystem – borrowed from biology and very prevalent in tech talk meaning how different systems work together
7) Amplify – no, not a music phrase, it simply means to improve or increase
8) Thinking outside the box – thinking creatively or differently to how we’ve always done it
9) Drinking the Kool-aid – going along with a bad idea just because all your peers are
10) Singing from the same hymn sheet – a self explanatory Xmas themed one
Christmas Bonus Annoying Phrase: Connect – meet, chat, get in touch with. You know, connect.
“This kind of jargon is pointless, irritating and so often confusing. I’m sure it would be a paradigm shifter (get it?) if people just spoke simply and said what they mean. Here’s hoping.”